Getting Plugged In

I never realized how important being plugged into your church community was. Growing up, we went to church on most Sundays, I went to VBS in the summers and when we moved I started going to a youth program at a local church. However, it never went deeper than that for me as far as church involvement was concerned. I was a kid so that was probably a huge part of it, but being really plugged in to my church family was not a priority. 

Enter early adulthood I rarely went to church. I knew I loved my Savior Jesus Christ but it just was not my top priority again. I am not saying it is bad not to go to church, there are many avenues now that you can be plugged in if you can't physically be there and I think that is so awesome! However, in recent months I've learned the importance of the church community and those amazing God given relationships. 

When we had the boys, church felt impossible. We had chosen to hold off on vaccines for a bit, so I wasn't going to put them in the nursery. When we did attempt to go, we tried the mother's room. Husbands are typically not allowed but the mother who was in there nursing her baby saw that we had two babies and I needed a hand...it was so hard and we ended up leaving because we couldn't hear the message. My anxiety spiked much during those first few years of the boys' lives and it wasn't until recently I started feeling like myself again. 

Sometimes I just smile at the amazing why God works. I was feeling extremely secluded when I had the boys. Their entrance into the world was traumatizing for me, add having TWO babies to cart every where and it was just too much. I didn't do much for the first 2.5 years of the boys' lives. I never took them to the park if I was by myself, they didn't experience many things I saw my friends experiencing with their singletons. With that said, a friend of mine who I had talked to on and off over the years told me about Mother of Multiples at a local church. I so badly needed those connections, those friends who knew exactly how I was feeling, I was craving it. I can say that was the first thing that I involved myself in after the boys that really helped me get out. It gave me an excuse to leave the house and it fed a part of me that was hungry. I am so so so grateful for these women. It has been so amazing for my boys too, I just love it! As MOPs was feeding my faith I knew that I needed to start attending church more. I was feeling better but my heart was still missing something. 

Six months ago a close friend of mine told me that the pastor who performed our wedding ceremony moved to a new location...right by our house. I was ecstatic! We started attending and on the second day I was there I signed us up for a community group based on marriage. It has been a gift for us to be involved and more plugged in. My relationship with the Lord feels stronger than it has in a long time. We still have Sundays we can't go or choose not to because my husband works 6 days a week and they only family day we get is Sunday. However, being plugged into the group has been great for our spiritual walk together. It bums me out when we can't make it to our group meet ups, like today. One of our littles is sick...again. This has been the worst cold/ flu season EVER! Sick kids are part of life, busy schedules are part of life, tiredness is part of life, you have to put forth an effort to improve yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually. That is why being plugged in is important! It gives you more opportunities to stay on course than fall back. We might not get to church as often as we should or could, but we are trying. We are working to grow in our spiritual walk which looks different for each person. The important thing is the sense of community, the accountability and the growth. 

So get plugged in friends! In a way that will help you grow in the Lord! Just like everything else, change takes time, but you'll notice a huge sense of love and spiritual growth when you make these connections. I am so thankful I fought through those hard days and that the Lord put friends in my life to help me find my way back. 

Know Your Tribe

Being a mom is hard. I truly don't feel that any mom will say "heck yeah, this is the easiest thing I've ever done". Having friends to cling to during those super hard days, friends who get it, who've cried over spilled milk, who have been so exhausted they can't think straight, who have sacrificed in the most loving ways for their children to be happy, who have tried to have an adult conversation with their kids around, only to be interrupted an endless amount of times and then forget what it was they were actually saying...those friends are your life savers. Your tribe.

A few weeks ago we took a trip up to my husbands home town. He went on an incredible ride along the Kern Canyon and I got the opportunity to hang out with one of my tribe members (haha). But really, this friend is one my husband grew up with and through our mom journey, she has become one of my closest friends. She, myself and another one of my best friends text each other weekly. We talk about anything from fitness to how we feel we've failed as moms or wives and everything in between. These two friends have been a saving grace. They support me, help me KNOW that I am not alone when I struggle.

Here are a couple pictures from our trip

Mt. Mesa Bike Gang

Friends walking to our favorite brewery for lunch

This chick! You would never know by our smiles and cheers but we were constantly chasing our littles around the patio of the brewery, telling them not to jump off the rocks or climb to high. Don't get me wrong, we had a great time together, but lunch with a friend when you bring the kiddos along is 100% different than going solo, even with the most well behaved kids. That's why knowing your tribe, whether they are parents or not, is so important. Cling tight to them. They will be your solid ground when your world is spinning out of control. They will tell you, that you are not alone in your day to day struggles, they will love on  you when you feel the most unlovable.

I am so thankful for my tribe of wonderful friends. Thank you for loving me and walking this crazy journey with me!

Potty Training Twin BOYS

This is a post I've been sitting on for while. I wrote it in my phone as I was in the process of potty training the boys, but never got around to posting it. My old laptop was a pain in the behind to ever turn on and use...but get me a MacBook and I'm like a whole new lady! Woohoo!

In March of 2015 I decided it was time to potty train my freshly turned two year old twin boys. Which, if you've talked to moms of boys and girls, they will usually tell you how much harder of a time they had training their boys. They had been showing me the signs a few months prior, but I wasn't ready to take on the task...I wish I would have when they first showed me signs, because when I finally decided to tackle this mountain of a task, they were kind of over it. I choose not to do the three day method, I mean, I semi attempted that ridiculousness and quickly decided it wasn't for me or for the boys. I think it is fantastic when parents have success with that method, because it sure beats 10 months of teaching! However, I just felt that since I am a stay at home mom there was no real urgency for me, plus they were on the younger side for potty training. Here is a snippet of my attempts in the beginning, I have no idea where my day one is by the way, I'm sure I just wanted to forget it ever happened:

Day two potty traing with twins

We started in the afternoon again...our morning have been really slow...so naturally they don't get dressed until later in the day. Unless we have somewhere to be. 

12:30pm get both boys in big boys pants

12:40pm spend 5 to 10 mins in the bathroom...I'm thinking I don't have the patience for this. 

12:45pm HB is naked running around the house. Sitting on all the toys...I know this is how most families potty train it's just, ya know, doesn't sit with me right that he is putting his little nakey booty all over their toys and my couch...ha! 

1pm both boys are naked and running around the house and making monkey noises. Do I live in the jungle? 😂

1:45pm we made it to nap time! No accidents! But no pee in the toilet either. I'm pretty sure HB peed as soon as the diaper went on, but at least he held it? 

3:15pm CJ is naked again. We watch Bubble Guppies with a towel on the couch 

3:30pm HB is up. We keep watching Bubble Guppies with towels

4:00pm daddy gets home. So far no accidents 

5pm...well we made it. We had to out pull-ups on 

for dinner but they didn't have any accident...so that's a plus 

6pm daddy does baths while I workout...Leif comes out to the garage and tells me HB went potty in the potty! Success!!!! He got a Reese's peice of cereal (I don't have candy in the house, and to them it's just as good) yay! I feel like one success with one reward is the bump I've been trying to get over all day! 

Day three 

I've decided to just handle this in small sections. A lot of advice said to put on undies and never look back. 

It's 8:30am we took off diapers and now they are naked. I put on their undies and then both "had to go" so they are naked again *sigh*

Both are much more interested in the toilet today though. They both want Reese's so they are trying to use the toilet...let's hope this is a start! 

No pee in the toilet but no accidents either. We took naps and then had to run to target. We get back on track after their afternoon nap 

It's 6:12: we put them in undies after dinner 

One accident .... Three feet from the toilet. Oy 

Day 4? 

Does it really count? I Honestly didn't work on it at all because we were gone. But both just peed in the toilet after bath, and both were super proud...okay tomorrow...it's on! 

So as you can see the process was a hot mess. There were many times I threw up my arms in frustration. Many times I yelled, tried time outs...I mean it was just bad. Luckily one of the boys got it before the other and once that happened it felt like a whole new ball game...I did have to take a break from it for my other son. I was just getting so frustrated and it was detrimental to our days, not worth getting as upset as I was. Three months in a diaper and two days later of retraining and he got it. 

There are still times when I am out that I feel diapers would just be easier so I don't have to run to the front of the store from the very BACK of the store just for a small tinkle. Now that they both truly get it though, my life is sooooo much easier! Only one is still in diapers at night and I am okay with that. 

Moral of the story? Know your kids, watch their signs, use what works for them and not for you. My son who picked it up faster is that kid who likes to follow rules, he is like his momma in that way. My other son is that " I do it myself" kid and I love him for that! I knew that he would do it because it was his terms not mine. I had to find ways that made it seem like it was his idea to go potty. Remember, parents, although our kids don't believe this simple fact, we are smarter than them. 

If it takes you three days or a process over ten months....you can do it!