We got to bring HB home on Good Friday last year. March 29, 2013. What a GREAT Friday that was.
I took pictures as we left the NICU. Pictures of those doors that we pushed through nearly every day to see our little boys, pictures of the boys in their car seats side by side. I took video of us driving out of the parking structure. Silly? Maybe, but it was a HUGE deal for us. We were finally closing the NICU chapter and opening up a new one at home.
Leaving the NICU was bittersweet in a way.You see, even though you want nothing more than your babies to be home with you, there is a fear. A fear they might DSAT or Brady on your watch and you'll never know, a fear that in their sleep they might stop breathing and there isn't a machine to let you know that something is up. In the NICU they were safe. I know they were safe with us, of course, but those alarms and machines although scary at first, become a sense of comfort. We became close with the nurses. They see you in your most vulnerable state. I was really shut off from the world during that time, but those nurses and doctors were some of the only people I wanted to talk to. After five long weeks, we were finally saying goodbye and taking our little HB home.
We got home late that night. As we pulled up there was one of those wooden storks in our front yard. I cannot tell you how much that meant to me. Not being able to bring the boys home from the hospital with me was really hard, I didn't get newborn pictures of them wrapped up all cute or people who got to visit my babies in the nursery. But seeing this sign in my lawn that night brought tears to my eyes because I finally got something that was "normal". It was really special and I am so thankful to my friend who made that sign for us.
That night was sleepless, as it is for all new parents. I am pretty sure I checked to see if HB was breathing like a thousand times! We luckily had bought an Angel Care monitor that will sound an alarm if your baby stops moving for more than 20 seconds. It picks up their breathing as small of a movement as that is. That gave us some comfort. Finally my heart was in one place. I had my husband and my sweet baby boys all under one roof.
Here we are, a year later. With two amazing little boys. Who walk, crawl, climb, babble, laugh, cry, sing and so much more. It is incredible to me that just a year ago these little guys were barely 6 pounds. Wow, what a miracle a baby is.
Our last ride up the elevator to the 4th floor!
Those doors, I'll never forget the first time being pushed through them. I was so scared/ excited/ nervous...
What was waiting for us when we came home as a WHOLE family :)
