We've All Been There

I dubbed it the great Disneyland Bathroom Tantrum of 2016. 

I really thought I had made it past the tantrums in public stage unscathed. I mean, I have twins and never had to deal with a public meltdown before. Mom win! I've never really given the boys the opportunity; they've been contained when we go in stores avoiding the random grabbing of all the things and the fight to put the things back, I always make sure we go out after naps or waaaay before, and I always have a snack to keep them occupied.  

Well this day, the stars aligned and I failed on all my survival tactics. The massive tantrum began and lasted for 15 minutes. I yelled, I whisper yelled (you know that wonderful clenching of the teeth while you practically growl at your child to listen? Yeah, I did that), I pleaded, I threatened to leave Disneyland all together. 

Nothing worked. 

I had to ride it out and let him do his thing. While I did my very best not to throw my own personal tantrum. I felt judged. Some mothers looked at me with the "oh sweetie, I've been there" and I felt the "control your child" stares. Made up or not I felt it.  

Before I had kids, I was the one who heard a kid in public throwing a tantrum and thought "ugh control your kid, mine will NEVER do that in public". I'm embarrassed to admit that, and I really hope I'm not the only one who has been humbled by having their very own tantrum throwers. But when I became a mom I quickly realized that you really have no control of these little beings what so ever. These amazing people you brought into the world are individuals, they are unique, they are their own person, and they are sometimes completely out of control. You can definitely shape them by teaching them your ways but every now and then their own ideas come out (oh my!). Whether it's by a lack of communication skills or a lack of understanding their feelings sometime the only way they feel a release is by kicking and screaming.  

When we see this happening we need to offer grace to these kiddos and their parents. Our kids are not perfect and we certainly are not either. We cannot hold kids and parents to these standards of perfection. When you see that momma struggling maybe ask if you can help or encourage her by telling her "I've been there" or if she looks to flustered, say a prayer for her momma heart. 

Because we have all been there and if you haven't maybe there is another battle that you have to face as a parent. We all need to give each other grace and most of all, ourselves.